She Knows.

*John walks through the door after spending the day with me*

CrayCray: "Get in the car, there's something we have to talk about"

*They get in the car*

John: Mom...I

Cray: You were with your girlfriend weren't you?

John: I...

Cray: Don't try to lie to me.

John: *Silence*...Y...yeah.

Cray: Hmm. Well...So Let's talk about this girl then. She's the one you've been spending all your time with? the reason you're always so eager to spend time out and why you're always coming home late?

John: ...

Cray: I'm not mad you know. I had my first boyfriend in college. He was three years older than me.....So have you met her family?

John: Yes. They hate me.

Cray: WHAT!?!?

John: Just kidding...they don't, they're very nice.

Cray: Good. They BETTER like you.

John: don't worry...I think they do.

Cray: and you like this girl a lot, don't you?

John: y...yes.

Cray: Hmm, well why don't you bring her over next week so that I can meet her? Maybe she can stay for dinner...or maybe I could take the two of you out for dinner....I can't WAIT to meet this girl!!


Yeah...so uh. She knows...and she didn't burst into flames or eat him alive.
Still one problem: she doesn't know that I'm not Korean :/
So...I'm going to continue freaking the flip out until the day when she decides to kill me (I am praying for a quick and painless death.) :D
Wish me LuckkkK~!

Problems.

Okay, First off I apologize for pretty much completely ignoring blogger for almost a month...and btw, I'm also having that weird glitch thing where Blogger logs me out every time I try to comment on someone's post...werid :/

Okay so, even though I haven't blogged about it (even though you all know about it LOL)...this is an issue I've been kind of..."struggling" with for a while now I guess...the only reason I'm choosing to write about it is because maybe you guys have suggestion or solutions for me? Because I could really use some help...

So...it's a little after 4:30 p.m. I'm sitting in my Grandparent's apartment alone waiting for John to be able to come out so we can spend time together...The only problem? I've been waiting since 1:30. And this isn't the first time...the day of SAT's I sat in the high school parking lot for 2 hours before he was finally allowed out...And to be honest, I really want to say "I don't mind...I'll wait forever!" But I'm only human...and I'm really tired of sitting around for hours and hours without a clue of what's going on...and now, when he finally is able to come out...what time will he have to be home 6? 7? we won't even be able to do anything.
And it's really not his fault...I can't be mad at him...but I don't want to say "Um...hey...I dunno how to say this but sitting around for three and a half hours waiting every weekend kind of sucks."
I just don't know what to do...obviously his mom isn't going to change any time soon...but I'm getting really tired of just sitting here waiting all day...it...well it really sucks. I don't know what to do...is there anything I can do? If you guys have any idea how we can fix this, please tell me, because I don't have a clue :(

Update...?

Okay, so I'm not really one for non-formal posts, but this is just a short thing to say sorry, since I've totally been ignoring my blogger lately..

1. Sorry for my absence, I promise to catch up on everyones posts as soon as I can :3
2. Uh...not much is new, I'm just pretty stressed about the end of the year events and finals and work and stuff...yeah the usual...I'm trying so so so hard not to have extreme junioritis.
3. As far as things go with erm...Christmas Lights...I just wanna say that things are going reeeeeeeeally well and I'm very very very happy :)

Well...That's all for now...
Talk/Write to y'all soon.

Bad Dreams

I woke up this morning in a panic...I have no idea why...I think I had a bad dream last night? I think...I think I had a lot of bad dreams last night...I woke up feeling really scared and sad and just...not happy. But it had nothing to do with anything that might have happened in real life...but for some reason, whatever it is that a dreamed about, worried me enough to put me in a bad mood today....I don't know if that really makes sense.
I guess what I mean is...it's like when you're happy everything seems happier. And when you're upset...even small things seem much worse. I went to sleep smiling last night...I talked to him on the phone for 2 hours...but neither of us had any idea that we had been on the phone for that long since the conversation flowed really well...I can honestly say that that's the most fun I've had on the phone in a long time :)
And when you go to sleep smiling as much as I was...all the problems in the world kind of turn into minor annoyances that retreat to the back of your mind.
But in the morning...everything....well everything feels kind of real again...and maybe it's only because the problems seem even worse because I'm in such a...well I would call it "content with a pinch of stress and anxiety" kind of mood.

I mean, aside from the general stress everyone is feeling right now: "OMG my GPA sucks, I fail at SAT's, I hate my life, I'm never going to get into college so I should just crawl into a hole and die." Which I am totally totally feeling right now...there are also...err...other things that I'm worrying a lot about...like whether or not I'll ever actually be able to spend time with him for more than 20 minutes T______T
It sounds really stupid but...it's quite painful to be honest...it's like every time I get to see him...I get so happy, but it's almost like a "teaser", because then he has to leave and I feel worse than before...It's honestly like every moment I'm not with him is just sitting and anticipating the next time I'll be able to be with him.
Missing someone.....sucks.
I don't even know what I'm saying anymore...I just feel really...bleh. I wish things were a bit simpler? I wish there weren't so many complications surrounding everything. I just want to be able to have fun without all the worry and stress...